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WIIIIIILD Guitar Solo.
Old 08-03-2006, 01:25 PM   #1
Vivaldi Amuro
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Default WIIIIIILD Guitar Solo.

I'm sorry if this is old, but I bet at least one of you have not seen this =D

Things you learn from watching porn

1. Women wear high heels to bed.

2. Men are never impotent.

3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.

4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her.

5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm.

6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly middle-aged men.




7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blow job.

8. Women always orgasm when men do.

9. A blow job will always get a woman off a speeding ticket.

10. All women are noisy fucks.

11. People in the 70's couldn't fuck unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background.

12. Those tits are real.

13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt.

14. Men always groan 'OH YEAH' when they cum.

15. If there is two of them they 'high five' each other. (and the girl isn't disgusted!)

16. Double penetration makes women smile.

17. Asian men don't exist.

18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes the boyfriend won't bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend's mouth.

19. There's a plot.

20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a woman by giving her a gentle slap on the ass.

21. Nurses suck patients cocks.

22. Men always pull out.

23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she'll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking both of you.

24. Women never have headaches.

25. When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her to 'suck it'

26. Assholes are clean.

27. A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned.

28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's pants and find a cock there.

29. Men don't have to beg.

30. When standing during a blow job, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other proudly on his hip..

31. Pigtails = handlebars
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Old 08-03-2006, 01:50 PM   #2
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For what I view, #17 is incorrect.

#19 = what? Did you only watch like... La Blue Girl?

#22 is iffy.
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Old 08-03-2006, 02:02 PM   #3
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Quote:
14. Men always groan 'OH YEAH' when they cum.
aww man

awwwwww

I hate it when youre watching a porn video and its decent and all, with the woman moaning and stuff, then suddenly you hear a loud and deep OHHH YEAHH to ruin your fapping mood.
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You post in Forum Boredom and you don't have your 3D glasses?????
 

Old 08-03-2006, 02:25 PM   #4
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Quote:
14. Men always turn into the Kool Aid man when they cum
5char
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Old 08-03-2006, 02:57 PM   #5
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Vivaldi you have been making strange threads.

Are you ill?
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Old 08-03-2006, 02:59 PM   #6
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Quote:
31. Pigtails = handlebars
"Putt-putt-putt...VROOM-VROOM-VROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMM! *thrust* HONK *thrust* HONK!"
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Old 08-03-2006, 03:16 PM   #7
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Quote:
17. Asian men don't exist.
For what I've found, this is untrue. I think the appropriate phrase would be, "Asian men exist, but they're all gay."
 

Old 08-03-2006, 05:19 PM   #8
Hortence:The Muleface Mod
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#32: If a non-participant is in the room (often holding a camera), them being as talkative and as loudly commentative as possible will always enhance the mood.
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Old 08-03-2006, 05:21 PM   #9
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27. A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned.

Thank you for clearing this up. I was never sure about this one
 

Old 08-04-2006, 12:28 AM   #10
Vivaldi Amuro
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Quote:
Originally Posted by God
Vivaldi you have been making strange threads.

Are you ill?
I have been. If I was a FB newb I'd totally be kicked the fuck out.

Thank you guys =D
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Old 08-04-2006, 12:42 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vivaldi Amuro
28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's pants and find a cock there.
Always.

Don't want to make a useless topic but http://objection.mrdictionary.net/go.php?n=601613
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